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Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Voulez-vous Coucher Avec Moi....

Even in the healthiest of relationships is there any way to prepare yourself for the unexpected threesomes that can arise? Even if you're the only two people in the bed, there's always someone who's been there before you. And though the boxer briefs of past loves may not be hidden under the pillow, what traces do they leave behind and how does this effect your current partner?

What can we learn from our past loves? I have a tendency to remain tight with former flames; not for the sake of keeping the door cracked in case I want to have another go, but because I have a connection with them on numerous levels. The more I learn about them the more I learn about myself. This subject can be a difficult issue to broach with a current lover. How do you find a balance...is there ever a happy medium?

Is it pretty much a given that your new lover will be allergic to loves of the past? I have a tendency to detach myself from a situation and see it from the outside in. I love being able to view things objectively and devoid of emotion, making decisions based on logic. Unfortunately, I'm learning my fancy schmancy skill isn't cutting it in the love department....spill on isle 7....Blanche broke another heart...

It always starts with the same song and dance: "I know you know my boyfriend is out of town, so have a drink let's talk it over...so many things I shouldn't be saying now, you know I like my boys a little bit older". Even when both parties enter a situation with the best of intentions, one can walk away feeling like their love has been used. I ask you...is there any way to prevent this?

And what about that guy that you always come back to in between the serious relationships? Oh my bad, is that just me? There is a man who I'll refer to as Mr. In Between - he's not a rebound because I never let him get that serious, but he does provide me a boost now and again to get me back in the swing of things when necessary. He calls me his stray cat because I show up without warning and I'm always gone by sunrise.

Why not so serious about Mr. In Between? For starters he isnt what I'm ultimately looking for. But I ask you...it is healthy to have such a buddy...one who knows you inside out and upside down. It worked in the past, but I'm starting to reconsider that notion these days. We're all getting a bit older, a bit wiser and my Mr. In Between, once satisfied being the no strings attached kind of fellow is collecting all kinds of string and twine. After years of such on and off activity, is it time to trim off the loose and frayed ends? Before someone really gets hurt....

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